10 Years

Wow.  This day snuck up on me......even though I had booked the day off, I hadn't clued into the fact that this was Stefan's 10 year cancerversary.  The day has certainly brought back some memories of 10 years ago....and that call from Stefan saying he had a brain tumour that shook our world.  I'm grateful for every single day of those 10 years and keep praying for more.

I haven't blogged in a while - what do you say in a year like this one, when everyone is struggling with something.  Seems like our gripes pale in comparison to many....so we just hibernate in our bubble, and try to keep positive.

Stefan is in the good phase of his chemo cycle at the moment, (and luckily for Christmas) he has about 3 good weeks to the one bad.  During the good weeks, I can pretend that everything is normal.  For about 7-10 days of each month, while Stefan is taking his pills and the few days after, we can't pretend.  Stefan manages pretty well.  Instead of morning runs that week, he does his walks, and he may actually take some time to have a nap or watch a show in the afternoon.  Swallowing the pills is a challenge for him, and gets a little harder each month.  These are the hard days as we are reminded that Stefan is fighting something pretty bad.  He only has 4 more cycles to go (assuming all is okay as things go along).  He has his MRI roughly every two months, and we have been told that everything looks stable.

I have been quite busy with work, which is perhaps a hidden blessing as busy work means I can't stress over brain tumours.  Being at home has been beneficial since I can sneak extra cuddles in at lunch.  COVID stresses us out I'm sure as much as everyone else.  I put serious thought into moving us up to the Yukon for the school year to see if we could find a solution that would keep Stefan safe and let the kids go to school.  It obviously didn't pan out, and we felt the best option was to keep the kids home.  They continue to be supported by two amazing teachers, and of course Stefan.  They keep a pretty regular schedule with their hours the same as the school day.  I know it's been a struggle for Charlotte as this would have been her first year at middle school, a time when friends and meeting new people is so important.  Thank goodness for some solid friend connections, facetime and roblox.  

Ultimately, I think this COVID/Chemo duo has been most challenging for our family, as they haven't been able to visit/support us this year. and vice versa  But, we are doing okay.  I feel a bit selfish being able to covet Stefan to myself this year.....but due to COVID, I don't even have to feel guilty about it.  We would usually be so busy in December hosting parties and family dinners....I miss our family and friends very much - but taking the opportunity to enjoy the quiet, kids and Stefan.  

Today - we managed to get in a family walk in our beautiful 'back yard', and we toasted 'surviving 10 years' over some take out tonight.  I didn't do Christmas cards this year - so don't be surprised if I ring you up to catch up instead!  I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy.  We look forward to hopefully seeing many of you sometime in 2021.