It was Charlotte's turn to see the neurologist today. The Pediatrician had put the referral in a while ago. At the time we had said "if Charlotte is walking by then do we still need to go?", and I remember her saying no, we can cancel it, but we thought it can't hurt to go.
So, we went, fully expecting the neurologist to say "she looks great, is doing well, and you can go". Wellllll......it didn't quite go according to planned. After the regular questions and checks (quite familiar to us now), the Dr. said he would like to do a MRI. Because Charlotte has delays in two areas, speech and gross motor, it's general practice to do a MRI, metabolic and genetic testing. The Pediatrician had already done the testing (all with good results), so last step to do was the MRI. It would be both on her brain and spinal cord. While she's progressing, and there has never been regression, this is general practice in determining the 'why'.
So....I initially wanted to shout "my daughter is just fine, she's been progressing remarkably this past month. leave her alone - buzz off!". But, my rational side calmed myself down and tried to listen. It can be a 2 year waiting list for a sedated MRI (the idea of sedating my little girl for a MRI is in itself terrifying), but the Dr. expects us to get a call in 6-12 months. It's likely nothing....at least I think this is what I heard the Dr. say.
I'm a little numb right now. The last time 1 of the 2 (now 2.5) most important people in my life went for a MRI, my world was turned upside down. We didn't think anything was wrong with Stefan. Brain tumours are not genetic - but of course it has crossed our mind (how can it not).
I was overwhelmed before today's appointment. I'm away for 2 days next week for work. Between preparing for that (work wise and making sure the home front is taken care of), day to day appointments/meetings, Stefan's illness, arranging work for the house, and day to day tasks like cutting my little girls nails....I was already feeling the pinch. Going from the high of the happiness of my little girls birthday party, to all the scary thoughts associated with her getting a MRI. It really hasn't been a good day.
Shall I get a little cheese to go with my whine?
Are we working ourselves up over nothing? Does it just seem like alot since our plate was already full?
3 comments:
Holy crap, not whine at all Taleen. I would be on the ground from all that you've been doing lately, and what you've been dealing with. The MRI for Charlotte is just their protocol...I hope the waiting is not too much for you, and that its not alot of waiting. It seems like all the times Stefan was supposed to wait a long time for one, it happened very quickly. Keep your head up, I think you are doing so amazing with all this. Your attitude is incredible, always so cheerful and keeping positive. Don't forget that! We're thinking of you guys!
Brandie and family
ARGH!! Oh Taleen, un-real! You whine away lady! It is truly pouring down on you guys right now and I don't blame you whatsoever. :-( Please let me know if you guys need anything. We love you!
The Scrivens'
Ah Taleen, my thoughts are with you. How frustrating. Do not berate yourself for feeling low. It is a scary thing. Always remember what is important, and concentrate on that.
And don't let them kick you while you are down. We've "got your back"!
Sending good, healthy vibes your way... and lots of love.
Pam and Mike
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