Delayed Again

Charlotte's ANC wasn't high enough to start so we are delayed another week from starting chemo.  It was still 0.4, the same level as last week.  The nurse said it's not uncommon to be delayed 2 weeks.  We will welcome the additional week break, but at the same time, we would like to carry on with treatment, power through till this is all done and resume our normal lives.  I tell myself, the extra week will help Charlotte power up for the next spell.

Charlotte has been in great spirits - your typical happy 3 year old!  But......she has been puking on occasion.  It's been every couple days.  I thought at first it was nausea, but I think it is just certain foods not sitting well with her, or if she eats too much.  Afterwards, she's fine.  While she hasn't lost weight, she is so tiny, she can't afford to lose any.  I was never one of those moms who stressed over what her kid was eating, but we are obviously in a different ball game now.  She will be very excited to eat something, and then won't touch it, or will, but will gag.  I know chemo effects taste buds, and some of the drugs leave a metallic taste in the mouth.  This is obviously the case with her, poor thing.  We are trying to offer a variety of foods, and at least her favorite comfort food, quinoa, is still a good go to item.

It was a very welcome reprieve having Michelle here last weekend - a great addition to the bubble.  While she was here, we got to view the (not quite final) book for Charlotte put together by Michelle and Charlotte's Army.  It brought tears to my eyes, and Charlotte loved it!  Thanks everyone!

We have two runs coming up.  Stefan will be doing the Spring Sprint on Sunday, and I will probably be representing us at the Child Run next weekend.  We are looking forward to it as Stefan and I have been going a little stir crazy.  I notice we come up with odd excuses to get out of the house.

Stefan: I need to go to Rona....I need to...ummmm....look at some stones

Taleen: Who wants to go to the mailbox with me?  (in a very excited tone)

Once in a while we will get a bit adventuress.  We have taken Charlotte to Art Knapps twice.  Figuring the open (basically outside) store on a quiet weekday will be safe.  Charlotte was like a kid in the candy store, you could kinda tell she doesn't get out much.  After about 30 minutes though (and sanitizing her hands 3 times), I started to have a panic attack and got her out of there.  Such is our life!

It's not too late if you would still like to join us at one of the runs (links are above).  If you would like to donate, please donate to Stefan in the Child Run.  If he hits $1,000, it will get matched by Chip Wilson (Founder of Lululemon)!  Nathan has already hit his $1,000!

Charlotte turns 3!

I can't believe our little girl has turned 3!  We celebrated on Saturday with a little birthday party in the sun!  Michelle had come in from Whitehorse just to visit us, and was a great help for birthday fun!  Auntie Bex, Uncle Steve and cousin Abbey made a drop by, and my parents rounded out the party guests! We will be continuing the birthday celebrations with Stefan's parents tomorrow night as we celebrate Grandma's birthday too!  Charlotte's chemo was supposed to start last Friday, but we are thankful for the birthday respite.  We will start this Friday instead.

I've put together a little birthday movie - my first attempt at such a project - so bare with me!

ps. thanks to the Granville's for the bouncy castle!

We can't complain

We got out to enjoy this beautiful day with a picnic at Rocky Point Park.  I guess if we are going to be stuck in a city, we are lucky it's here!

Fish and chips! (I know everyone looks angry in this picture, but I assure you, we had a great time!)

Ice cream!

Mothers Day

Hoping all the mom's out there had a fantastic day!  I got spoiled by my hubby and adorable kiddies!

I've blogged about some of the wonderful women in my life.  So, it's only fitting I spend a moment to give our own mommas some big thanks on her day.  I don't know what I would have done with out my mom, and Stefan's mom during the first crazy weeks of his and Charlotte's diagnoses. 

My mom claims to love Charlotte more then me (I don't think that's possible)! I know Charlotte's illness has been really tough for her.  I often have to give her the firm "no tears" during some of Charlotte's difficult times.  On Friday, Charlotte had a bit of nausea hit her out of nowhere.  It took my mom by surprise, and she ended up tearing up.  I didn't give her the "no tears" as Charlotte was fine, and I think it's good for Charlotte to see this side of her treatment too.  Just told Charlotte that TooToo (her name for grandma) is just a little sad, she doesn't like to see her sick.  Charlotte just nodded and went back to her t.v. show. 

My mom will say to me, I think I'm more a hindrance then a help....but that is absolutely not the case.  I'll take her passionate, loving, fun self over any other type of momma! 

And, I can't forget Stefan's mom!  I won the in-law lottery with the bestest mother-in-law ever!  She has been amazing every time she has come to help out!  With the kids, the garden, and with her fantastic pumpkin loaf!

Happy Mothers Day to all the fantastic mom's out there!

My boobs job

It's been one week since Nathan's last bottle of breast milk.  Nathan was breastfed right up until Charlotte was diagnosed.  But that week of pumping while we were at the hospital took a tole on my milk supply.  That, and Nathan got so used to the bottle, I think he grew a little impatient with me.  I kept up pumping, but less and less often - until I pumped his last bottle last week and decided to call it quits.  While I feel sad letting it go, I'm okay with it.  I was never one of those moms that was in love with breastfeeding.  It was a love hate relationship. 

Nathan is away for two nights with Stefan to his grandparents, my first night away from him (sniff sniff).  It was really hard coming home from the hospital today to not find his smiling face.  I'm so fortunate for this little bright spot, he is such a good baby, and he has made this process so much smoother then it could be.  He is great for whoever is watching him - makes all this tugging at my heart strings in different directions bearable. 

I sometimes can't help but feel robbed.  I didn't get to fully enjoy my pregnancy as we were going through Stefan's treatment.  And now my maternity leave time with him has been impacted as we go through this stage of our lives.  I have to remind myself that he is getting more quality time with his father and grandmothers he may not have had otherwise.  (I also remind myself how fortunate we are to have a whole year of maternity leave in Canada).  While I would love to believe I'm the only one for him - he does just fine when I'm not around, and benefit's from the extra love.

That being said, if anyone does have a cryogenic chamber they could lend me so I can freeze him for a year or two until things get less hectic, please give me a call. 

I know I haven't updated on how Charlotte is doing in awhile - no news is good news.  She is tolerating the chemo remarkably well (I think this is due to all the positive thoughts and prayers coming her way - keep them up please Army!).  We are roughly half way through this phase, and next Friday will repeat the last 4 weeks of treatment.  We hit the beach after this morning's hospital visit to enjoy the sunshine!

I can't complain when I get to spend the day playing at the beach with my girl!

Full Disclosure

Since I told all about Stefan's embarrassing mishap from Thursday, it's only fair that I share the story of my dumbness yesterday.

I was preparing a lovely dinner for Stefan and I of crab legs (a treat!).  While cutting the crab legs before cooking them, I managed to slice my thumb pretty good.  I immediately applied pressure while moving to the kitchen sink and warned Stefan that he may not want to look.  Stefan jumped into first aid mode - did not pass out - and got me taped up (with plenty of gauze) for my 5 minute drive to the hospital.  I'm not sure why I rushed to the hospital, as I then proceeded to wait 3 hours before getting my two stitches.  I can tell you, I was sure wishing I had eaten the crab before I left to the hospital.

With my taped up thumb - I was giving everyone in the waiting room with me the constant thumbs up, which was good for a couple laughs and it at least didn't get old before the 3 hours were up!  I finally got to dig into those crab legs at 9:30pm - boy were they good - or I was really hungry.

I told Stefan I just didn't want him to feel left out.  It was either that, or just that I wanted some hospital love too - why should Charlotte and Stefan have it all?  Someone gave us the theory that Stefan not passing out at the sight of my blood must mean he doesn't really love me.  Anyone know if there is a nexus type ER pass we can apply for?

Gong Show

I'm not sure what exactly a gong show is - but it seems a fitting description of yesterday.

It was Stefan's turn to take Charlotte in to the clinic.  It was a relatively short scheduled day, just getting her port accessed for Friday's treatment, getting blood work done, and a possible platelet transfusion.

So - Nathan and I headed to mom and baby boot camp.  As I finished up boot camp, I noticed a couple missed calls, and Stefan calling.  It was fortunate I spoke to him before I checked this voicemail message:

Hello, it's the charge nurse at the oncology clinic at Children's Hospital.  I'm just calling to let you know Charlotte's dad fainted.  He's now awake and seems okay, is alert and knows where he is, but we are just wondering if you can come in, if it's possible for you to come?  You can reach me at....., or you can of course contact your husband if he has his cell phone.  So, that is what happened, he's now up and a little embarrassed but okay.  It's a little unclear exactly what happened, just wanted you to be aware of it, and it would be helpful if you came into the clinic.

So, yes, it was good I spoke to Stefan before hearing that!

Stefan "I just did the most idiotic thing.....remember the ER when Charlotte was diagnosed?"
Me "you passed out?!" (Stefan passed out in the ER March 8th)
Stefan "yes, hit the bathroom door"
Me "are you okay?  Do you need me to come drive you?"

Luckily, my sister-in-law was with me for the boot camp, so we all drove down to the hospital, had a little Lageston pow-wow with 3 adults, two babies and superchuck!  While there, we got filled in on what happened.  Between Stefan and the different nurses, here is what I gathered...

As soon as they finished drawing Charlotte's blood.  Stefan had a very strong urge to pee (later speaking to the Dr. - this is a common feeling pre-passing out).  He put Charlotte safely down (was on his lap) and headed toward the bathroom.  One nurse must have seen his pale face, asked "are you okay", and a moment later he was falling head first into the bathroom door, rebounded off that to fall backward hitting the back of his head on the floor.  He was out for about 30 seconds.

The sound of him hitting was so loud it was heard across the hall.  Meanwhile - 6 nurses went running to Charlotte, who was a little freaked out (I don't think the 6 nurses helped).  It didn't take her long to calm down once she knew daddy was okay.  Another 6 or so nurses attended to Stefan.  One nurse had to be stopped from calling 911!

This all happened around 11:30 am, I made it down there around 1.  We were done at the clinic around 3.  Everyone was quite concerned about Stefan, so we thought we better head to a Dr.  (Children's Hospital can only treat Children so Stefan was out of luck.)  We managed to get an appointment for 4:20.  We had about 40 minutes of Nathan and I sitting in the clinic while Stefan and Charlotte stayed in the car.  We didn't want to bring Charlotte into a medical clinic so they waited until we could whisk her into a room.

The Dr. said it would be careless of him to not do anything considering Stefan's history.  Since his brain may be a little different then the average person after 2 surgeries and radiation.  And, since he was exhibiting symptoms of a mild concussion (and with the peeing sensation before passing out) he suggested we go to the ER to get checked out.

It was now 5pm, so, I dropped Stefan at the Royal Columbia ER where his sister met up with him so I could get home to feed the kids and get them to bed (and the ER was the absolute last place we would want our immune compromised little girl!).

I will say right now - I have really good kids!  I didn't get home until 6:30 with rush hour traffic.  Nathan had been in a car seat for about 4 straight hours by this point, both kids usually eat at 5pm - and not one cry from them the whole time!  Stefan got in right away for his cat scan and an ECG - was given the green light, and was home by 8pm.  It could have gone a lot worse in my books.

Stefan is feeling rather embarrassed and mad at himself.  I am just glad he's okay!  My poor hubby...I have assured him I STILL would not trade him in!  Please - share your most embarrassing story in the comments so Stefan doesn't feel so alone!

notice the dent in the forehead?

My Sister

My sister came to visit us last week to help out.  This may not seem out of the ordinary to you - but here is the thing - my sister is brand new so to speak....here is the short story:

My family knew that my father had a daughter when he was young (18) who was given up for adoption.  We knew she existed, and we had been hoping one day she would come knocking at our door!  Well, last August, through a couple emails between my sister-in-law (who runs a craft fair at Christmas time), and my sister's biological mom (who was emailing about a table at the said craft fair)....we finally met my sister!  My father passed away when I was 16, sad that my sister never got to meet him, but I almost think she was his gift to us!  Perhaps he had a play in things from up above on sending her to us now?

It was one of the highlights of our crazy year, and when she offered to come for a couple days to help with Nathan and where possible Charlotte and us - I didn't have to think twice to say "yes"!

In my opinion (and others), she looks a lot like my dad, and has characteristics like her father and grandmother.  It was such a lovely few days!  The kids took to her right away and I had a great visit!  My dear sister is very empathetic, an easy listener, and just all around very sweet!  Hoping to see her again soon!